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Q: "My 11th
Grade daughter has had great success playing volleyball on travel teams. But
in her small high school, she gets very little playing time.
She's taller and stronger than one player ahead of her. This player is a
senior and I know that the coach favors seniors. The other person ahead of
her is a freshman who's probably more agile than my daughter, so she can
maybe get a few more digs. My daughter worked out over the summer and
did very well in tests at tryouts. I feel her hard work is not being
rewarded. Unfortunately, she won't talk to the coach about this, because
she's afraid she'll get less playing time. I sometimes think she's too naïve
and nice. She's not a cutthroat competitor. Her senior year is next
year and I want her to enjoy her last year of sports. What can I do?
A: Congratulations on your patience,
civility and Old School persistence. A lot of ‘modern’ parents would have
sued the coach and the school district, and pulled their kid off the team,
under these circumstances.
Regardless of what kinds of travel teams
the girl has played on outside of school, the real issue is: Is she a better
player than the high school teammates playing ahead of her, given the
competition in her team’s league? It sounds like she might not be – at least
not in her coach’s eyes. And right or wrong, the coach’s perception is
reality.
Another obstacle may be that her coach
resents kids who play on travel teams outside the school. If that’s the
case, I’m not sure you can do much except to have the girl give up those
other teams. Not my recommendation; only you and she know her priorities.
Either way, I recommend that your daughter
schedule a meeting with the coach as soon as possible. It doesn’t have to be
confrontational. Her goal should simply be to ask what she needs to do to
earn more playing time. It’s no different from asking an English teacher
what extra credit she could do to improve her grade.
You should not attend this meeting. In
fact, at your daughter’s age, a parent shouldn’t have to confront a coach
about anything more controversial than the weather. Matters of playing time
are between the athlete and the coach.
Lastly, at practice, your daughter has to
find a way to outperform the kids ahead of her. If she has a chance to line
up opposite them in drills, she must do so – and then beat them.
Essentially, she has to change her coach’s perception of her, though
performance and productivity.
Tell her to get her digs in at practice --
and she will play!
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